Off script

Following is a transcript of King George's weekly Saturday radio address.  He's kicking the Democrats because his beloved Protect America Act -- his Get Out of Jail Free card -- has expired.  This is a taste of what's coming in the week or two ahead.

The transcript has been edited for the sake of clarity.

Members of Congress will soon be returning to Washington and they have urgent business to attend to. They left town on a 10-day recess without passing vital legislation giving our intelligence professionals the tools they need to quickly and effectively monitor foreign terrorist communications phone calls made by Americans.

Congress' failure to pass this legislation was irresponsible astonishing, quite frankly. They've rolled over to my every demand so far, even with my ratings in the toilet.  So, yeah, I was stunned.  It will leave our nation telecom giants increasingly vulnerable to attack lawsuits. And Congress must fix this damage to our national my security immediately.  Man, if one of those lawsuits gets into a court, the stuff that might come out about what else I've been doing could ruin me!

The way ahead is clear. The Senate has already passed a good bill caved in to the corporations by an overwhelming bipartisan majority. I particularly want to thank Dianne Feinstein, so-called Democrat of California, for supporting this gift to the corporate titans. This bill has strong bipartisan support in the House of Representatives, and would pass if given an up-or-down vote. But House leaders are blocking this legislation, and the reason can be summed up in three words: class-action lawsuits rule of law.

The Senate bill would prevent plaintiffs' attorneys from suing companies believed to have helped defend America trampled on the civil liberties of Americans after the 9/11 attacks. More than 40 of these lawsuits have been filed, seeking hundreds of billions of dollars in damages from these companies. It is unfair and unjust to threaten these companies with financial ruin, only because they are believed to have done the right thing and helped their country been pressured into cooperating under the threat of being denied lucrative government contracts.  But the highest cost of all is to our national security my criminal liability. Without protection from lawsuits, private companies will be increasingly unwilling to take the risk of helping us with vital intelligence activities I'm screwed.

After the Congress failed to act last week, one telecommunications company executive was asked by the Wall Street Journal how his company would respond to a request for help. He answered that because of the threat of lawsuits, quote, "I'm not doing it ...I'm not going to do something voluntarily.  They're just going to have to threaten my children and dog. Again."

In other words, the House's refusal to act is undermining our ability to get cooperation from private companies. And that undermines our efforts to protect us me from terrorist attack the threat of exposure.

Director of National Intelligence Mike McConnell recently explained that the vast majority of the communications infrastructure we rely on in the United States is owned and operated by the private sector. And, as a result of the Republican deregulation jihad, the telecoms and other corporations are exempt from serving any social benefit.  Ravenous pursuit of profit is their only responsibility.  Because of the failure to provide liability protection, he says, private companies who have "willingly helped us in the past, are now saying, 'You can't protect me. Why should I help you?'"  (Which is what I'll soon be saying to Musharraf.)

When Congress reconvenes on Monday, members of the House have a choice to make: They can empower the trial bar uphold the Constitution — or they can empower the intelligence community. They can help class action trial lawyers sue for billions of dollars uphold the Constitution — or they can help our intelligence officials protect millions of lives.

They can put our national security in the hands of plaintiffs' lawyers uphold the Constitution — or they can entrust it to the men and women of our government who work day and night to keep us safe. As they make their choice, members of Congress must never forget: Somewhere in the world, at this very moment, terrorists my political advisers are planning the next propaganda attack on America. And to protect America from such attacks, we Congress must protect our telecommunications companies from abusive lawsuits impeach and convict me as soon as possible.

Thank you for listening.